Photography Thinks
So, I crashed after a walk with my friend Art. I don’t have many friends, least of all ones I want to take a walk with. He left me, cold, after telling me he was off to his doctor to find out about his blood test, one to determine the extent of his dementia. I cried, inside. All I have is CLL. Still have my mind. And he has so much to offer and remember.
So, I went to Bednar’s. Took a self-portrait. Bought some veggies and wine. Thought about I had a friend who wouldn’t be around for long.
Have you ever noticed the sign in the bathrooms of public places which reads, “Employees Must Wash Their Hands.” Leaving said the issue of how many do, DO YOU?
https://www.nytimes.com/2026/04/13/well/ai-chatbots-cancer.html
I have this kind of cancer. Almost died during treatment. Sharon and the doctor saved me. Sharon screamed through my fog that she needed me and wasn’t ready for me to die. I heard her. Hema (hematologist in cancer patient language) said I was one tough son-of-a- bitch.
I am.
A person in my blood cancer conversation group wrote about coping by exercise, research and positive thinking. I wrote him and sent him and another person coping with the disease a flower – a tulip, reminding them that a flower in bloom shows life.
In response, one wrote back, “CLL means Living a Long Life.”
So, I finished mourning my Mother’s death, 30 years ago, almost to the day. She died right after I was charged and way before I was convicted (that was still 30 tortuous months off). Still not sure how it happened though she told me she heard Governor Pataki railing at me. The next I knew, she had a heart attack and died, leaving me motherless and family less.
I will always blame Pataki and his Court of selfish fools, along with all of you who ruined my life and my career. I read the words you wrote and saw your faces as you testified against me, made fun of me, humiliated me, denigrated me, banished me and convicted me. I never recovered.
We should never hate even those we don’t get along with or understand. And we should not jail or kill those who love freedom and justice, especially the ones without the power or money to defend themselves.
I light a candle for her.
Today, I left a blood sample. Friday, I see the Doc. Not worried about my blood counts. Feel good.
People come to get chemo or another thing. Some cannot walk out. Some cannot walk in. I did both today. And there isn’t anything worth reading.
So, I had a picture selected for a group show of Art in Public Spaces at the Palm Beach Airport. Hadn’t seen my work since it was hung. Looks better than on my laptop.
Proud to be showing with a group of fellow artists from the area.
Mani/Pedi. No champagne, but I wished for it.
So, picking up where I left off. Been sick. Recovered. Back to still life from the Golden Age in the Netherlands.
Oranges. Make you smile. Symbols of good fortune. Skulls to remind us all we are mortal. And some flowers to lighten up our lives. But without a targeted medication, DEAD.